When meltdowns start to build up inside, you, have the ability to shut them down. Now let me be clear, this is not, and I mean not, stuffing it down and ignoring it. This is, dealing with how you feel, acknowledging it, then letting it go. You Can Do It! Wheather you broke a nail, snapped at your wife, slipped in the rain, or whatever it is that got you down in the dumps, there is a cure.
First, step back by yourself and ask yourself what is it that really bothered you? The situation, the event, a person, or simply not being in control (this is my big one). Once you've identified it ask yourself Is it that big a deal, really? Will it matter tomorrow? Next week? A year or five? Most of the time the answer is no. Ask yourself is this worth an argument? Ruining my day or someone else's? Should I fix it or let it go? (letting go is usually best). Lastly ask yourself if this was made worse by outside triggers and how you can improve your mood.
I find lack of sunshine and too much junk food makes me see things more negatively or react badly. I take a deep breath and follow the steps. No matter how bad something is, 99% of the time it is not permenant. Most things are not worth an argument. Feeling overwhelmed at times is normal but TEMPORARY. I have a cup of my favorite tea and force myself to smile. I find one thing to think about that I am greatful for (today it's heaters). I choose to let it go and not spread negativity.
The dictionary defines Contagious as: capable of being transmitted or spread; tending to to spread from person to person. Bad moods, bad attitudes, bad anything is contagious. A honked horn, a snapped response, a dirty look, all spread like wildfire. Even inner negative thoughts can burn out of control. You can stop the trend. The Good news is, Positive Attitudes and smiles spread just as fast! :) It's ok to have a bad day. It's not ok to make someone else's bad too. You might be surprised how a simple act of kindness to someone else can make you feel better. In turn they feel better and are kind to someone else. Yet another example of how one person can make a positive difference. Come on give it a try!
Need some help? It takes practice. Here are some ideas for simple kindness but I encourage you to think outside the list and expand it. Please share your additional ideas with me.
Simple Kind Acts:
Spend a few extra minutes with your pets or family. Hold a door open for a stranger. Give someone right of way in the car. Tell someone you know or don't know how great they look (Ex: I love you're sweater it goes beautifully with you hair). Listen to someone who needs a friendly ear, but not give advice unless asked for. Post a positive quote on facebook or twitter. Call someone just to say 'Hi I Love You'. Ok Take it from here! You can do it!
An important note: Stop Apologizing! If someone says you've hurt their feelings then apologize. If you just feel guilty or like you didn't do something well enough, don't apologize just do better next time. My favorite acting coach William Cowart once told me "Guilt is like paying a debt you don't owe". Wise man. Ask yourself if you really owe that debt you are making yourself suffer for. Remember to be kind to yourself too.
Simple Kind Acts For Yourself:
Have a cup of tea and take time to just enjoy it alone. Take a bubble bath or long shower. Watch an old movie. Read an inspirational book (I have many suggestions). Catch up with an old friend. Go for a walk. Put on some happy music. Hug your pets. Volunteer. There is so much you can do.
Now some people just like to argue and some things are worth fighting for. If you choose to fight, do it for a cause worthy of your energy. Fight for people and things and causes that can't fight for themselves. Choose your battles.
Happiness comes from within. It does not appear with money or success. Now Go! Be Positive. Spread the love and the good contagion. Lets kill off negativity. We Can Do Anything! All we have to do is try :)
Stay Positive! Rebecca